Debra Kunz

On how many occasions have you heard women, and men for that matter, say, “Well, we’ve been together so long… we decided to get married.” Using how long you’ve been together as a reason for nuptials is serious settling. It’s like you didn’t even make the decision, you’re letting the time invested in the relationship make it for you.

Basically, this decision says, “I’m going to spend the rest of my life with someone I may not actually want to marry, yet I’m going to anyway because we’ve spent X years together.” So you’re trading the rest of your life because you don’t want to give up what you believe you’ve already “invested?” Seems like a disproportionate investment to me. Yes, it’ll hurt to end a relationship that’s lasted a long time. Though I’m certain it’s better than choosing to marry the man and commit to spending ALL of your years with him.

I’ve heard it many times… “Well, we didn’t know what else to do so we got married. Seemed like the next step.” Instead of, “I’m excited to spend the rest of my life with him.” If you’ve done this already in your life, you’ve experienced what I’m talking about here. If you haven’t, please don’t. Stop. Think. And carefully consider what you truly want and if it’s really with this man you’ve spent X years with just because you’ve spent X years with him.

Date Deliberately,

Debra