Debra Kunz

He may be smart, educated, come from the kind of family you like, in the right geographic area, and has a stable job. That doesn’t tell you what he believes, how he lives or how he’ll treat you.

His resume may say he went to an ivy league college, has an “important” career, seems to be financially stable, and drives a nice car. However, it doesn’t tell you if he likes his mother, or is kind to his family. It doesn’t say if he likes being a father (if he has kids) or if he does anything to care for them. It doesn’t say if he has any friends. It doesn’t say what his spiritual or religious beliefs may be or how he practices them. It doesn’t say how he grew up or if he’s overcome some of the issues of his past.

Learning about all of those things needs to be experienced. I’ve been on dates with men who have a stellar resume yet have zero scruples. I suspect one particular man would’ve sold his dog if it advanced his career. (Thanks to my fellow pet people who are outraged at that comment.) The conversational depth only included his job. Nothing was said about his family and this particular man had kids! Nothing! Not a word about them. So, if I had only gone by his credentials, without considering what he believed or how he lived, it would have been a miserable relationship since I have different values.

You won’t know if he’s worthy beyond “on paper” until you meet him, feel the chemistry, see how he lives his life, experience his character, and how he treats you.

Date Deliberately,

Debra

P.S. Click for more about choosing who gets a chance.